I am so happy to announce that my book, Beyond Your Wardrobe, is now available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. For more information about ordering and early order bonuses, check out my book page. Hope that many of you will consider purchasing it and joining me on a journey to embracing the freedom found in modesty.

For this next sneak peek of Beyond Your Wardrobe, I am going to share an excerpt from chapter 5 - "It's What's Inside that Counts." My next post about the book will be when it is finally available. If you want to learn more, stay tuned to this blog!

One of the problems I see with the way modesty is addressed in many churches is that it is almost exclusively based on the clothes you wear. Although some churches get it right, others struggle with making it all about the rules without addressing your heart attitude. The truth is that attitude is everything when it comes to modesty. Most of us don’t think of that, but it remains true:

The way that you dress reflects the condition of your heart.

This concept really should make you think twice when you get dressed in the morning. Your outside reflects what’s happening inside your heart. This means that there may be times when a woman may be appropriately covered, but because she still has an unhealthy desire for attention, she has an immodest attitude. In moments when I encounter young women like this, it grieves me to see them reflecting the struggles of their hearts in their clothing choices. This is why it’s important to make sure your insides match your outsides.

Before we dive into the main passage for this chapter, I want to take a look at a story about when one of God’s prophets had to learn a lesson about physical beauty. Samuel would be the last of the judges that reigned over Israel when they were governed by a theocracy (letting God be their king with human judges being God’s spokesman), but the people insisted on having a king so that they could be like the nations around them. Samuel was upset that they wouldn’t listen to God, but God assured Samuel that it would be alright and that He would reveal the right man to Samuel. The man God chose was named Saul. Through a series of events, Saul and one of his father’s servants found themselves in the same town as Samuel and God revealed that this man was meant to be king. Samuel probably knew Saul was king material from the first time he looked at him. The Scriptures tell us that Saul was tall and handsome (1 Samuel 9:2). Anointing him probably seemed like a no-brainer. God said Saul would be the one to save Israel from the Philistines. It all sounded very promising.

However, it didn’t take very long for King Saul to stop listening to the Lord’s instruction. On more than one occasion, Saul only obeyed part of the Lord’s commands instead of all of them. He started to try to solve problems on his own and do things his way. After multiple offenses and warnings, Samuel declared that the Lord had rejected Saul as king and would choose another to take his place. Eventually, the Lord would send Samuel to see Jesse of Bethlehem to choose one of his sons to anoint as the next king of Israel. To make sure that Saul would not discover his plan, God told Samuel to invite Jesse and his sons to offer a sacrifice with him. As they were doing so, Samuel saw Jesse’s oldest son, Eliab. Samuel thought for sure that he would be the Lord’s anointed. But God said to him,

“Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 ESV)

At the end of the day, after seeing seven of Jesse’s sons, Samuel asked to see the youngest. When David arrived, straight from the fields with the herds, the Lord confirmed that he would be the Lord’s anointed.

I think it’s interesting to note that although David was described as having beautiful eyes, he was also described as being “ruddy,” or reddish, in appearance. I believe that David didn’t immediately strike Samuel’s eye as being king material, especially since Saul had been tall and handsome. I think that’s part of the reason that the Lord had to essentially tell Samuel, “I’m picking this man for his heart, not his appearance. Be prepared, because this guy might not be much to look at.”
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We live in a world where we judge everyone and everything by external appearances. But in this story, we learn that God doesn’t judge a book by its cover. He cares more about our hearts being in line with His will than He does about our physical appearance. Saul might have been easy on the eyes, but he didn’t have his heart in line with the Lord. David, on the other hand, may not have been much to look at as a ruddy shepherd, but he had the heart willing to do what God asked of him. He later became remembered as a man after God’s own heart. Like David, if your heart is in the right place, that makes you beautiful to God, no matter what anyone else says. I believe that this is a lesson that we all need to learn...

Like what you read so far? Then make plans to order your copy of Beyond Your Wardrobe today! Preorder is available now for the ebook through any of the following links:

Paperback will be available on Amazon and
​Barnes & Noble by February 21, 2020. 

To help promote my book, I am going to be giving a sneak peek of the contents, one this week and one next week. Each one will be a section of a chapter that will hopefully give you a taste of what the book is about. This first sneak peak is the first few pages of Chapter 1 - "Lies We Believe About Physical Beauty". It features a story from my college trip to New York City. If you enjoy it, make sure to like and share it to spread the word. Thanks ~ Bethel

While I was a student at a Christian college, I got to spend a week in New York City for a seminar class. That trip was an experience I will never forget. I had never been to New York, and it was only the second time in my life I had traveled by airplane. This class called “Exegeting the City” helped us learn how to make Christianity work in an urban context. I learned so much on that trip, but there is one experience that stands out from the others because it taught me a lot about what the world perceives about fashion and beauty.
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One of the points that our professor was trying to communicate to us is that rich people are people, just like you and me, even if there was a cultural gap between us. To help us bridge the gap, we were given a special assignment. Together we walked to one of the fanciest retail stores in the United States, Bergdorf Goodman’s. We were given instructions to go into the store, find the formal clothing department, and try those clothes on. The men went to the men’s store across the street and the ladies when into the women’s store. Even before we got to the formal wear department, we all felt like a fish out of water. We finally got to the formal gowns, it was like we were on a completely different planet. We looked through the dresses together, but most of us were scared about trying them on since we would have to ask the attendants. I was quite nervous myself, but I had been preparing myself to do this since I had a friend tell me about this assignment. So I was the brave one that asked first. I will never forget the contrast in the attendants’ reactions. The first one was polite and helpful, as would be expected. She even let me know that the dress was available in other colors. But the other one gave me a glance that said, “You don’t have enough money to be touching that dress.” I guess my clothes had given away that I was not part of the first percent clientele that they usually served. But that glance of judgment based on my clothes is something I have never forgotten.

​The nice attendant helped me to my fitting room and eventually, the other girls worked up the courage to ask as well. The fitting room was the size of my current bedroom. (Ok, maybe not, but it was still huge). It even had one of those round modeling podiums. The dress I picked was a silver strapless mermaid with layered fabric. Although it was pretty, it almost seemed like the kind of dress I could find in the prom department of a local department store. I’m sure the materials were superior quality, but it didn’t seem like the kind of dress I would search for in a store like this. I took some pictures and took the dress off. Up to this point, I don’t think I had taken notice of the price. But I wanted to make sure I documented it, so I finally looked at the price tag: $4,330. I remember thinking to myself: who in their right mind would pay this much for a dress like this? Part of me started to think that the rude attendant had a point.

Addressing the Lies

I believe this sales attendant had bought into the many lies that the culture fed her about a women’s value. In our culture today, we believe a lot of things that just aren’t true, whether we realize it or not. Buying into them will cause us to live our lives apart from what God has in store for us. So many of the lies we believe can be as a result of deception from our own emotions or our struggles with shame. Either way, it makes us harder for those of us that are trying to live our lives in light of the truth.
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To me, some of the most pressing lies we face have to do with our self-worth and our physical appearance. This is an area of life that can very easily be influenced by the father of lies, making us question who we are and why our lives even matter. Because the beauty standards that society puts before us are nearly impossible to obtain, we spend our time chasing something we can never reach and therefore are never satisfied. If we don’t learn how to have our identity firmly rooted in Christ, we will never find the heart motivation behind the need for modesty in our world today. So we are going to begin this journey by walking through several different lies many of us have come to believe about our physical appearance...

Like what you read so far? Then make plans to order your copy of Beyond Your Wardrobe today! Preorder is available now for the ebook through any of the following links:

Paperback will be available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and more by February 21, 2020.